I’m currently 15,000 words into editing the rough draft, and I’ve stumbled across a scene that I simply cannot use. As you may remember, I changed the victim of the fae plague from hero Maywin’s mother to his brother Gregor. As you can imagine, this changes the dynamics between characters and several other things about the first few chapters of the book. However, I thought this scene was beautiful. And, since it’s not particularly spoiler-y, I’ve decided to post it here. (For reference, Maywin is the main character. His parents are Nikolai and Rosyth, and his best friend Cory the dwarf has just agreed to accompany him on his quest to find the Elysians.)
Enjoy!
Maywin was surprised to find Aunt Undra at home. She was Nikolai’s older sister, but they’d never gotten along as children and didn’t interact much as adults, so Maywin had never spent much time with her. She had a pinched face and graying hair that she kept in a tight bun instead of a braid.
“Hello, Aunt Undra,” said Maywin quietly.
“And where have you been?” Undra demanded. “Your shoes are dirty. Take them off. Skies above, have you been playing in the mud? With your mother sick in bed? For shame, Maywin!”
“Leave him be!” snapped Nikolai. Maywin hadn’t noticed him at his workbench. He was working with shaking hands and nervous energy, but stopped for a moment to give Undra a surprisingly sharp glare. “He’s trying to find someone to go with him. Any luck, Maywin?”
Maywin nodded. “Cory’s coming with me.”
“Who’s Cory?” asked Undra.
“A dwarf,” said Maywin.
“A dwarf?” said Undra. “Nikolai, you can’t let him–”
“I will let him do whatever it takes to save my wife,” said Nikolai. He turned to Maywin. “We’ve got a pack made up for you. Food, clothes, blankets, flint and steel, canteen. Can you think of anything else you’ll need?”
“A decent companion,” said Undra. “He’ll come home unable to have an intelligent conversation. And he’ll pick up that habit of chewing–what do they even call it, that horrid black stuff that stains your teeth?”
“Cory doesn’t even chew blackroot,” Maywin snapped. He pushed his way past her, ignoring his father (how could he work, with Rosyth dying?) and going into the back room. Rosyth had been rolled onto her side, as Loren said that it would prevent bedsores. Maywin went to his father’s side of the bed and leaned across so he could see her face better.
“I’m going, Mother,” he said. “I’m going to find the Elysians. I’m going to find a magician who can get your life-force back. And Cory’s coming with me.”
Rosyth perhaps breathed a bit deeper than normal, but she didn’t open her eyes, and she didn’t say anything. Maywin was still holding onto hope that she would wake up–that everything had been a mistake, that it was just a bad case of the flu that was making her tired, and that she’d wake up and smile and eagerly drink the tea that he and Nikolai had taken turns dripping between her lips for the past day. But Rosyth didn’t wake up.
“I’ll miss you, Mother.”
Maywin reached out and touched her hand. It was cold as death, and Maywin immediately drew back. Whether it was the cold or the fear that it brought with it, he hated it. Something stirred within his chest, a combination of fear and repulsion and the sort of angry sadness that brings tears and hot, red cheeks. But all those things came in moderation. Maywin took his hand back, and the frightened anger faded into the background of his heart.
“Aunt Undra’s here,” said Maywin. “I don’t know how well she’ll take care of you, but she’s really good at making sure things stay clean. You won’t have to worry about the house. Only thing is, she can’t cook, so I hope Father learns how to at least make porridge. I guess he doesn’t really have a choice. Unless he can get Aunt Undra to make porridge for him, but she puts too much salt in it. It’s a special kind of person who ruins porridge.”
Maybe it was Maywin’s imagination, but he could have sworn he saw the corners of Rosyth’s mouth twitch upwards in an attempted smile.
“I love you, Mother.”
Maywin put the bedsheet between his hand and Rosyth’s. It helped the cold, and Maywin was able to hold on for longer this time. “It’s probably dangerous,” he said. “I’m scared. I’m scared that we’ll get lost, or that we’ll find the magicians, but we won’t be able to find our way home–I’m scared that the Elysians won’t help us. But…I’m more scared of living life without you. So don’t worry about me, Mother. You remember–you remember when Milo died–and I was mad at myself, because I hadn’t done more to help him–you told me that I’d been brave and done my best, and that’s all that mattered. Well, I’m going to be brave, Mother. I’m going to be brave, and I’m going to try my best. I promise. So you can still be proud of me, even if–if I can’t–”
Tears pressed against Maywin’s clenched-shut eyelids, and he let go of Rosyth’s hand so he could rub them away. He glanced worriedly at the door, hoping that Nikolai wouldn’t come inside and see him crying. Or maybe he wouldn’t care. Aunt Undra would scold him, though, so he tried to control his breathing and his thoughts until the urge to cry went away.